Who in your world has celebrated a birthday since the start of this pandemic?

Did they have cake, candles, and all that fun stuff?

There have been several in my bubble, but my husband’s birthday last week really struck me …

As I was preparing his birthday cake I asked him what he was going to wish for – I know, I shouldn’t ask but we do after 33 years of marriage! – and he gave an exasperated shrug and said:

“What’s there to wish for when things are the way they are these days, and everything is so NOT normal? “

“Wishing for more control over my business and how I live life, won’t change anything.”

My heart lurched!

He has every right to wish things were better than they are right now. His business has taken a big hit and it’s truly been a sh*#t year.

And he’s not alone. As the pandemic takes another global uptick, it’s hard for most of us to feel in control or any more certain about what lies ahead.

His comment made me wonder how many others are ditching their birthday wishes, too. And is it just birthday wishes being ditched?

What about all the other ways we humans make wishes?

Like on a shooting star, or…

… a dandelion

… at 11:11

… a wishbone

… a wishing well or fountain

Will people simply stop wishing during this pandemic?

Then I was reminded of a sweet blog I’d read during the Spring lockdown.  It was about a suggestion box for the universe – built and randomly placed by François C. in a local neighbourhood – that had been filled with hundreds of wishes!

It was a nice reminder that despite Covid-19, we all still have dreams and hopes and wishes to express and how innovative people are – like semi-anonymous François C. –  in finding ways to help others keep spirits uplifted and express themselves.

It brought me a sense of wonder and joy when I first read it – and still does today, now that we’re back in a second lockdown phase.

Given the personal impact of Covid-19 and how long it’s dragged on, a lot of us might be numb to whatever we’re feeling, and many of us, still in a state of survival in many respects. Talk to anyone who’s dealing with the loss of loved ones, or a job or business; logistics with kids and schooling; or mental or physical health issues; etc.…

Wishing anything right now, just doesn’t feel practical.

With potential restrictions for Thanksgiving and possibly the holiday season, wishing is not on our radar.

It’s not surprising that our usual wishful thinking may be numbed out, diluted down, and restricted to what’s practical or within reason.

And if that’s what we’re doing, well… THAT’S not really wishing, is it bella?

WISHING HAS INEXPLICABLE TRANSFORMATIONAL MAGIC AND POWER!

We only need to look to the nonprofit Make-A-Wish Foundation for critically sick kids, to be convinced.

A 2018 Wish Impact study revealed proven health benefits when kids are granted a wish, with many of those kids going on to lead very healthy lives without the usual emergency visits, doctor visits, and medical bills.

More research is needed, but the mental and physical benefits of wishing has legs!

So, what can we do in these challenging times to resurrect and maybe revive our wishing?

And that’s not to say there’s anything WRONG if our wishes have become more pragmatic and less idealized or grandiose.

It’s completely understandable!

AND… I do recommend we not put our wishes on hold, numb them out, or lose sight of them.

LET’S BRING BACK THE MAGIC OF WISHING LIKE A KID AGAIN!

To revive our ability to WISH, means connecting to our feelings.

Try this “Feelings” list below! It’s a quick exercise. And I know it helps.

Here’s how:

• Take a few minutes to get quiet and close your eyes
• Start by identifying your deep wishes, desires or dreams – think pre-Covid if it’s easier
• Reflect on each wish, desire, aspiration that comes up: What will it be like if/when it happens?
• Next, identify the FEELING each one brings up.
• Last, jot those feelings down

What’s great about this exercise is how it gets us completely out of our rational, thinking minds, and curious about what we’re feeling.

It’s different than a gratitude list because it’s future-focused on possibilities and opportunities – the hallmarks of wishing and hoping – vs the present moment.

Here’s a bonus tip for you – Ritualize it!

• Adapt a gratitude jar into a Wishes Jar
• Start a running “Wish List” in a special journal
• Find a special container and create a Wishes Time-Capsule
• Host a Wish Party with family and friends to exchange or share each other’s wishes

It’s my belief that wishing has several transforming benefits to help us cope and develop our resiliency to overcome difficult challenges, including:

• Pressing pause
• Tapping into our ability get out of our day-to-day thinking to express gratitude
• Being curious about our feelings
• Developing a wonderful self-care practice

THERE’S NOTHING WRONG WITH WISHING!

Wishing and hoping give us optimism and strengthens our resilience.

Wishing during this pandemic is a lesson in “adulting” for most of us because we’re still figuring out how to adapt to difficult circumstances without getting lost in them.

If we intentionally hold onto – or revive – our wishes, it brings us back to the wonder we all had as kids.

Now, THAT’s something to wish for isn’t it, bella??

“wishes are made in moments of wonder and desperation. Wishes are prayers without a salutation and minus an amen.”  ― John David Anderson, Author of Granted.

Is daring to wish a bit of a struggle for you? I can help you restore your optimism and improve your well-being.

Book a FREE Clarity Chat with me on my calendar by clicking this button.

Is your stress level making it impossible to wish ANYTHING? Want to get a better handle on it and avoid potential burnout?

Do you still have wishes despite this pandemic?

I’d love to know… Big or small, what have you wished for lately? Leave me your comments in the space below (and thanks for sharing!).